The Kenya based National Media Group (NMG) has come out with its first annual “African Presidents Index”. The “African Leaders Scorecard” is derived on how the leaders were placed in five respected international indices of governance and NMG’s Political Index, such as : Democracy Index, Press Freedom Index, Corruption Index, etc. The scores vary from A+ to “Morgue”. The latter goes well below F-. This is what the report says regarding this grade:

“Due to the extraordinary oppressive, violent and corrupt governance found in many places on the continent, two special categories were added to these basic grades: the Intensive Care Unit and the Morgue. Leaders in this range represent the bottom of the barrel, and their countries need intensive rehabilitation to walk amongst the free and prosperous nations of the world”.

Obviously our own totalitarian leader Isaias Afworki didn’t disappoint us. Not only did he make it to the “Morgue” category with flying colors, he also ended up dead last within that category, with the poorest score imaginable – 12.14! No wonder the report describes it as “truly appalling performance”.

Under “Failures of this year”, here is what the Report says, “President Afworki continues to brutally repress free speech and thought with an iron fist. Eritrea has been deemed the country with the least press freedom in the world by Reports without Borders, more stifled even than North Korea – a remarkable ignominy. There is currently no privately owned media in the country.”

Our Beloved Tyrant also makes it to two equally dazzling sub-categories:

The “Coconut Heads of the Year” sub-category: “They are the archetypal bad governors; autocrats who run their countries like personal fiefdoms. These bad dudes trash national economies, refuse to hold meaningful elections, spends oodles of money on defence while populations starve, tear up constitutional order, spirit public funds to offshore accounts, destroy the free press, and build up cults of personality.”

“Long-Reigning Tyrants” sub-category: “The megalomaniacs have kept their countries locked in governance chokeholds for years, and in some cases for longer than four decades. They have hijacked the destinies of their nations, sucking up all political oxygen and monopolising political space. They tend to grow increasingly eccentric and paranoid as their reigns stretch on. Preferred is an almost royalist-style of governance, reminiscent of French King Louis XIV’s famous remark: (“etat, c’est moi’) there is much blood on these hands, which often took power through coups, wars or murders.”

Below is the scorecard for the African leaders. For the full report, press this link:  The African Presidents Index

1 Anerood Jugnauth Mauritius 83.54 A+

2 Pedro Pires Cape Verde 78.91 A
3 Ian Khama Botswana 78.7 A
4 John Atta Mills Ghana 72.56 A
5 Hifikepunye Lucas Pohamba Namibia 71.07 A-
6 Jacob Zuma South Africa 69.93 B+
7 James Michel Seychelles 66.4 B
8 Amadou Toumani Touré Mali 64.4 B
9 Ernest Bai Koroma Sierra Leone 61.89 B
10 Jakaya Mrisho Kikwete Tanzania 60.39 B-
11 Ellen Johnson-Sirleaf Liberia 60.32 B-
12 Rupiah Banda Zambia 59.59 C+
13 King Mohammed VI Morocco 54.84 C
14 Bethuel Pakalitha Mosisili Lesotho 54.5 C
15 Thomas Yayi Boni Benin 53.91 C
16 Mwai Kibaki Kenya 53.43 C
17 Bingu wa Mutharika Malawi 53.04 C
18 Abdoulaye Wade Senegal 51.68 C-
19 Paul Kagame Rwanda 51.31 C-
20 Yoweri Museveni Uganda 49.91 D+
21 Alassane Ouattara Cote D’ivoire 49.69 D+
22 Armando Guebuza Mozambique 49.35 D+
23 Zine El Abidine Ben Ali Tunisia 49.01 D
24 Salou Djibo Niger 48.55 D
25 Goodluck Jonathan Nigeria 46.06 D-
26 Pierre Nkurunziza Burundi 45.2 D-
27 Omar Ghaddafi Libya 44.64 F+
28 Abdelaziz Bouteflika Algeria 43.42 F
29 Alpha Conde Guinea 41.94 F
30 Mohamed Hosni Mubarak Egypt 40.74 F-
31 King Mswati III Swaziland 40.05 F-
32 Ahmed Abdallah Sambi Comoros 36.97 ICU
33 Mohamed Ould Abdelaziz Mauritania 36.29 ICU
34 Blaise Compaore Burkina Faso 35.7 ICU
35 Ali Ben Bongo Ondimba Gabon 34.28 ICU
36 Denis Sassou Nguesso Congo 33.43 ICU
37 Faure Gnassingbe Togo 33.38 ICU
38 Malam Bacai Sanha Guinea Bissau 32.84 ICU
39 Meles Zenawi Asres Ethiopia 32.68 ICU
40 Yahya Jammeh Gambia 32.48 ICU
41 Ismail Omar Guelleh Djibouti 31.53 ICU
42 Joseph Kabila Kabange DRC 30.18 ICU
43 José Eduardo dos Santos Angola 30.17 ICU
44 Paul Biya Cameroon 29.52 Morgue
45 Andry Rajoelina Madagascar 29.31 Morgue
46 François Bozizé Yangouvonda CAR 28.22 Morgue
47 Robert Gabriel Mugabe Zimbabwe 22.62 Morgue
48 Sheikh Sharif Sheikh Ahmed Somalia 22.41 Morgue
49 Idriss Déby Itno Chad 20.81 Morgue
50 Teodoro Obiang Nguema Mbasogo Equitorial Guinea    20.72 Morgue
51 Omar al-Bashir Sudan 15.67 Morgue
52 Isaias Afwerki Eritrea 12.14 Morgue